If both partners agree, is anything taboo? What about the use of vibrators? Is oral sex okay? These are just a few questions that Christian women asked about the sexual relationship in marriage from a survey that the authors conducted. But at the heart of each of these questions were two concerns: What does God prohibit in the sexual relationship between a husband and wife, and what does God permit?

They had experienced the unique pleasure of giving pleasure in such an intimate way to each other. He was writing to me because this enjoyable aspect of their sex life which had always been part of their marriage was now conflicting with his conscience. My first instinct was to reply that it sounds like his pastor has a boring sex life and is trying to justify it Biblically! God made sex. Whatever you do, you must both be comfortable with it. You must both feel safe.

Years ago, I was having lunch with a woman who would eventually become one of my closest friends. To say she and I had great ease in talking about sex in our marriages would be an understatement. To this day, she is a confidante who I know will always be up for a transparent and authentic conversation about sexual struggles and sexual joys.

Can a married couple have oral sex? Is it a sin to have oral sex? Is oral sex permissible according to the Bible?